Happy Wish You Weren't Mother's Day?

"I am done with her" a Mom said as she began our session
with she and her daughter the other day. I asked what she
meant and she basically let both of us know she didn't want
to be her daughter's mother any longer. I told her she really
didn't have than option as her daughter is only 13 and she
looked at me like I had two heads.

Where has the idea come from that young mothers have
a choice once they have had given birth to their children
and not placed them for adoption, or given custody
to someone else early in the child's life? A mom on
Dr. Phil's the other night mentioned just getting through
4-5 more years until the kids turned 18 as her theory on
"parenting" . Where has the message come from that to
mother a child is only biological in nature and
the rest is a spectator sport?

Mother's Day is Sunday. I had a friend whose young
daughter had given custody to her ex spouse as she just
didn't want to parent. She wondered out loud why no one
at work had brought her a mother's day gift as they had
all the other workers there? She decided it was because
she was so young...not thinking that perhaps they
remembered that her mother, ex spouse and his parents
had basically raised her son in her physical and emotional
absence since his birth. She appeared oblivious to that possibility.

If you wish you weren't a mother tomorrow....here are
a few theories for you: You can "fake it 'til you make it"
for your children's sake. No matter what, don't have any
more children for ANY reason. And don't just try, but do
get some professional assistance so you do not raise
another generation of Mothers with no parenting skills.

If you can't do it for yourself...do it for your Mother. It
will be the best gift you could ever possibly give her!
Accept your part as a Mother in parenting your children
....it is a lifetime filled with work, but also a lifetime of joy.





Jodi H. Underhill MEd. LMHC
Licensed Mental Health Counselor &
Certified K-12 Guidance Counselor
License #MH9166
Phone: 386.747.7148
Fax: 407.264.8289
www.junderhilltherapy.com